Coping with religious guilt
What is religious guilt?
Religious guilt is a natural moral emotion that arises when we believe we’ve fallen short of our spiritual or moral standards. In healthy amounts, it can guide us toward growth and accountability. But when it becomes chronic or rigid, often after strict teachings or spiritual abuse, it can shift into maladaptive guilt.
How does it feel?
It can feel like a heavy weight in the chest, racing thoughts of “never being good enough,” or deep shame that colors every decision. Over time, this persistent guilt can fuel anxiety, depression, and a fractured sense of self.
What can I do about it?
A therapist can help you trace the origins of your guilt, sometimes in childhood messages or unforgiving doctrines, and differentiate between healthy remorse and toxic shame.
We use cognitive restructuring to challenge “all‑or‑nothing” beliefs, and psychodynamic exploration to understand how guilt protects against deeper fears, like abandonment or unworthiness.
Practical techniques that we use include journaling compassionate letters to the younger self, guided imagery to “release” the burden, and setting clear boundaries with internalized voices.
Experiencing religious guilt can be tough. These practical steps can help.
Name the feeling.
When guilt arises, pause and label it (“This is religious guilt”).Take a self‑compassion break.
Speak to yourself as you would a friend—offer kindness, not judgment.Journal.
Write a letter to your younger self or to the part of you that still carries the shame.Do a boundary check.
Notice when “should” or “must” thoughts pop up, and gently question their origin.Do a grounding exercise.
Name five things you can see, four things you can touch and feel, three things you can hear. This will help you to shift out of spiraling thoughts.
Hi, I’m Stewart
I specialize in supporting clients through religious trauma, spiritual abuse, identity exploration and more.
Learn more